How To Get A Horse Of Your Own


I want my own horse!

My sister has had a horse for 4 years, and I get to ride her. But in a few years she is going off to college, and there goes my first horse. I really want to get my own so I can go with my sister riding. I have a place to board it, and I know all the costs, given that we have one. But my mom doesn’t want another one.

I am working with a 5 year old, but time will tell if I ever will get to ride him–I am lunging him now. I am the one who cares for my sister’s horse, and I want to go to college with a horse and be a vet (actually I wanted to be a trainer and my mom said no). And another thing, I don’t even get to lope my horse(my sister’s horse) because my mom says I will ruin her lope, and her timing. My relationship has never been great with my mom, I really need a companion and I have wanted a horse for 2 years but to no avail.

I just don’t know what to do to convince my mom and dad? I have saved up money, done chores, whined and begged(not my proudest moments) and have waited, but the answer is, “No your sister has one.” We are in 4-H also, and when my sister goes off to college she is taking her horse with her, so I will no longer get to participate in 4-H. People in our group offer to let me borrow their horses, but that’s not fair to them, either.

Help Me!!!! I need new ways to try to convince my parents. I am horse crazy and love everything about horses.


Hi, Michaela.

I don’t know how much I can actually help you, except to say that I’ve felt the same way when I was younger. Sometimes parents are just so focused on their own needs (paying bills, planning for the bigger picture, dealing with job related stress, etc.) that your voice is just lost in all the other drama. So I totally understand. But as far as advice, I would tell you:

1. Be patient. Any dream worth having is worth waiting for. Continue to plan, save, learn, and relish the horse contact that you currently have. Believe me, you are WAY ahead of a lot of girls your age who would give anything to be able to ride. So try to keep an optimistic outlook and be thankful that you do get to care for, train, and ride a horse on a regular basis. That’s way more than many girls have.

2. Be planning. Look for ways to make your dream appealing to your parents. For instance, keep an eye on classifieds or craigslist ads in your area. A horse might be posted as a real bargain that the owner just has to get rid of, and you might find one at a very low price or even free. Keep in mind that board will be the most expensive bill. If you’re old enough to work a job, find one, and put aside money for your horse fund. It might be two years before your parents say “yes”, but at least you’ll be two jumps ahead of them if you have found a cheap horse and saved up money to pay for its bills.

3. Be mature. As you stated, the whining probably isn’t your best tactic, as far as trying to gain your parents’ favor. You can make a request and make your feelings known without appearing to whine or insult them, and it will work in your favor. There is a huge difference in asking the right way and asking the wrong way, and it may be just what is needed to change their minds. If they recognize your maturity, knowledge, heart, and sweetness, they may decide that you’re ready for your own horse. I do find it unfair that your sister has one and you don’t. But fate is sometimes like that, and if they can only afford one horse, you have to deal with it until something changes. Try to keep a good attitude and understand that you will get your turn someday (even if it’s after you’re grown up, done with college, landed a good job and can afford to buy ten horses!)

I know this letter probably isn’t answering your problem. It is your parents’ decision so long as you are under their roof and your horse would be their liability. So just do all you can right now to learn more about horses and save up for the big day when you finally get your own. :)

Good luck, I’m cheering for you!